Command and Control

Previous: Panic Station

“Good girl.” Quiet. Firm. His smile, his smolder, they were back as he realized she was starting to understand. She was fighting it, but she was beginning to understand. If it was a roller coaster journey for him, he couldn't imagine what it was like for her. He had the benefit of age and experience to deal with certain parts of it, but she was so young. So pure. So…

Concentrate Seeley. Range etiquette.

He held her chin for a few moments, more, keeping her focussed on him. “Before you do anything else, look in your right hand.”

He released her chin, stood back a pace, crossed his arms, and looked down at her with a firm look. He wasn't trying to chide her. He wasn't trying to punish her. He wasn't trying to make her feel bad. He wanted her to see what her distraction had wrought, what it could mean. He wanted to teach her.

He wanted to protect her.

Static. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…..blink. blink. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Good girl. What?! Static? Shh. Hush. Static. Sh. Sh. Sh. Good girl. Blink. Blink.
She was so innocent. So sweet. How had she emerged from a mob life with hardly a record, and her soul so wonderfully intact? The Carmichaels must have doted on the only girl. But she wasn't spoiled or vain.

Hazel ringed in black drifted down.
Glock.
Gun.
Government Property.
She was a Carmichael.
She could have been shot on sight for carrying it out.
HOW COULD AN ITALIAN GET SO PALE?!
She swallowed. Curling left fingers around the barrel and releasing the grip for him to take.

Once he did…the world tilted a little. STATIC! SSSSSHHHHHHHHHHH… Dizzy. Breathe Gabi. It's okay. He knows you're new. To everything. Everything. Breathe. Dizzy. Upright. Still upright. If it had been momentous for him…Gabi had one date in high school. ONE. Always check your hands. Dizzy.

Her hand went to her neck and dots were put there for him to connect. The day they met. The panic. The fingers touching her neck. They day they had met, he'd shaken her to her very core, and she'd had a very bad attack. She had…taken off running for the cafe. Coffee. To calm the static. She'd sat beside him. She must have still been having an anxiety attack.

Her hand was on her neck now. But what a brave girl…she wasn't running.

“Seeley…”
“Master…”

Seeley had to release her chin to take the gun from her. He watched her fighting to release her fingers from it, to give it to him. It wasn't that she didn't want to, it was because she was lost.

He had to take his hand off her shoulder to make the weapon safe. He didn't want to. He had to.

Practiced hands. Fingers curled around the grip, finger along the frame. Left hand popped the magazine from the bottom, pulled the slide back with his hand over the ejection port to catch the round inside. Safe. He held up both hands to show the rangemaster what he'd done. He would know how close they'd come, but he trusted Seeley to do what was needed.

Now the situation was defused, he darted to his side to place everything down, safe. That didn't mean everything was safe, he still needed to make sure she was. That was more important.

He returned to stand in front of her, wrapping his arms around her, holding her close to him, his right hand reaching under her hair to hold her head against his chest.

“I've got you, Gabi. I'll keep you safe. It's okay.”

She caught that. Both hands up to show…oh, Jesus Mary and Joseph…static. STATIC pushing over the edge. Get it together, Gabi, you're going to embarrass him.

STATIC Well…that didn't help…Ssssshshshhhhhhh. How close had she been to the door?! She turned. Oh. Oh.oh.oh.oh. I can't breathe. Dizzy. Heart. I can't breathe. He can't want me. Look at me. Look at me. “The mob princess and the Fed….he can't want me.” STATICSSSSHHHHHHHH Did I say that out loud?

He's holding me. I'm embarrassing him. Stop being a FUCKUP, GABRIELLA!!

“Gabriella.” Full name. He'd been switching all night, heading towards the shorter, been using it more often. He needed to use something different to the 'norm', something for her to focus on.

“Look at me.” Firm. Commanding. Loving. Affectionate. All those things wrapped up in his warm voice, his goofy smile, his smoldering brown eyes. Something to focus on.

He wasn't going to let go.

He heard her mumbled assertion. He breathed in deep. This was going to be tough to get her to know, to understand. He knew she would fight it. He didn't know how he could explain it in terms she would understand in the few moments he had to get her back. To bring her back.

“Yes. He… I… Can want you.”

Word. Name. Full. Static. Help. Help. Help. Where was the exit? No. You can't leave. He can't protect you if you leave without him. Control.

You're under his control. Where was the exit? You can't leave. You're stuck here. He wants me. I want him. Hold it together, Gabi. You're too close to the point of no return and then it's off to the hospital for the IV drugs.

Drugs. Ativan. I DON'T HAVE ANY! Where's the exit? I don't know this place help!!

She looked at him, her eyes staring through his frantically. Her body was barely moving but it was plain in her eyes that she was internalizing in a desperate bid to not show any of it to any who might be watching. She didn't want to embarrass him and she was far too close to needing medical attention. Help. Help.

“I'm so sorry.”

“Home?” It… Wasn't a question. It was a statement. He didn't expect an answer, he was telling her. Then why did it sound like a question? Because he wasn't sure, he hadn't seen her like this.

He shifted, pulling his arms from around her, his right hand going from behind her head, down her shoulder, then arm, and entwining his fingers in hers.

“Come on.” He led her towards the exit. His jacket was ready as they walked past the armory, he didn't worry about the rest, and he had a word in the rangemaster's ear when before they left. Someone needed to clean up behind them. He'd make sure it happened properly.

Out of the range, through the sub-lobby, no-one questioned him. He was determined, knew what he was doing, and nobody messed with an agent on a mission. That his mission was to keep her safe, nothing to do with FBI business, didn't matter. He was given a wide berth as he took her out of the building and to his car.

Door open, help her in, whatever she needed. Door closed, run to his side, open door, get in, close door.

“Seatbelt, Gabi.” Firm, expecting to be followed. He checked on her. He would help her if she struggled, the whole thing if needed. She needed to be safe. He needed her to be safe.

Engine on, in gear, drive. Take her hand. He reached for her hand, wherever it was, and he slipped his fingers into hers. He drove, retracing his journey back to her apartment. He was almost on autopilot because he was worried about her. This late at night, even in the city, it was quiet enough that it wasn't a problem, it meant he could pay attention to her.

Every so often he would say her name. “Gabriella.” “Gabi.” See how she responded. This was going to be a long journey. Even though it wasn't that far.

Walk. Foot. Step. Stumble. Catch yourself. Gabriella Lucia…squeeze. Foot. Foot. Cheeks red. You're an embarrassment.

Seatbelt. You can manage that, right? No? Yes. At least you know how to do that much. Tell him to leave when you're home. Idiot. You don't deserve him.

Audible swallow. She was having trouble talking. Except three words. I'm so sorry…over and over.

He took her hand.
I'm so sorry.

Gabriella.
I'm so sorry.

Gabi.
I'm so sorry.

She suddenly seemed so small, eyes so wide…staring straight ahead. Forget you ever met me, Seeley. I'm so sorry.

No.
No?
NO!

A shudder. Forget me. No. NO! She was shaking. Her hand shaking in his grip, her other hand at her neck, fluttering. Her chest felt tight. No. No!! She didn't want to go to the hospital. Static was everywhere. Tune the antenna. Focus. Find the anchor. Grab the chain. Follow it to the surface. Heart pounding. I want to scream. Why? Why is it so overwhelming? Make him happy and he'll make you happy. Make him happy. Him. Him. Seeley. Master. Anchor. Anchor. Her head turned and slightly unfocused eyes made the shape of him. Blurry.

Rebel. Anchor. Follow the chain to the surface. What chain? Make one up. Arm your fears and slay them. He looks worried. No. Arm them. Slay them. Anchor. Follow the chain. Hands. Arms. Arms. Heart. His heart. Love his heart. Listen. Breathe. Anchor. Anchor.

Her eyes focused.

Next: Stay With You